Are you her mother?

Last week, my daughters and I were invited to a local beach by my friend. My older daughter, the big sister (BS) was thrilled. She loves playing in the sun, sand and water. The little sister (LS) was also excited. She has just begun walking on her own and the beach is a great haven to practice taking those tiny footsteps. It was late afternoon and the beach was relatively packed. BS was busy playing with her best friend on the see saw when I decided to take LS on the swings. Since there was only one baby swing and it was occupied, I sat LS down on my lap in a regular child-sized swing. She was delighted! Suddenly, to my right, I heard tiny voices belonging to a pair of twins asking me, "Are you her mother?"

I smiled and retorted, "Why wouldn't I be her mother?"

One of the twins answered, "Because she's Chinese." Then she proceeded to ask me if I was also Chinese.

I said, "No, but both of my daughters are Chinese. I flew over to China twice to adopt each one of them."

"Why didn't her real mother keep her?" asked one of the girls.

I took a deep breath and continued, "I am her real mother now. Her biological mother couldn't keep her because she was very poor and because China has a one-child policy. "

My answer seemed to satisfy the twins who then proudly announced that they were partly Chinese and Vietnamese.

Kids are both curious and bold enough to ask sensitive, private questions. Since adopting my second daughter, I have found that more kids are coming forward to ask me questions. While I don't really mind the questions, I try to be careful about the answers I give because I know that my daughters are listening. I want them to feel comfortable and confident with their lives - past, present and future! Soon enough, they will be the ones getting the questions. Will they be prepared to respond and will they be tough enough to handle them?