The butterfly princess & Lil Miss Ladybug

Seven Months Later

2009-09-12T06:51:00.004-05:00

If you're wondering what I've been up to over the last seven months, well..... I have been busy living life as a single mother of two. Since my "ex" and I had a commuter marriage, I have actually been a single mother for a long time, but was living in a bad marriage. Being divorced and free from an unhealthy situation is like having fresh oxygen in a stale room. I can breathe again. No one wants to be divorced, but it really does take two to make a relationship work. With one wheel, a bike isn't going anywhere. With one committed partner, a marriage will fail. Since getting divorced, I have spent quality time with friends and family, gotten back into the groove of working in a job that I love, and even started going out once in a while, making time for me. My daughters are growing into two sweet, loving, smart, amazing girls. Overall, I feel blessed with my life. Looking forward to catching up with all of my cyber friends.

Official Blog Break

2009-02-20T19:36:00.002-06:00

I have been blogging now for nearly four years. I love blogging, but lately rarely find the time to commit myself to writing. When I'm not so busy with my job, children, and impending divorce, I will resume my blog. Thank you dear blog friends for faithfully reading my posts, offering my support and advice over the years. I promise to still stop by and visit your blogs, but for now, I need a break.

Love,
Ashley

Do you remember gym class?

2009-02-10T05:50:00.002-06:00

When I was a teenager, I hated gym class. I thought it was boring, and I resented the smelly uniforms and numerous laps that we had to run. For me, it simply wasn't a pleasant experience. Today, I am working in a middle school where I get to see kids participating in gym class every day. Get to see you ask? Yes! Sometimes, the kids run around the entire school. Other day's, it's the cafeteria. They run while they listen to music, teen music. Our building is full of treadmills, and other exercise equipment. The gym teachers even play exercise videos for the students to follow. It's all state of the art. Gym class has come a long way.

In Search of Spring

2009-02-07T05:29:00.004-06:00

I never thought I would be a single parent, but here I am. It's not easy juggling work and children. In fact, at times, it's nothing short of overwhelming. Every week, I have to deal with the laundry, the grocery shopping, cleaning, food preparation, playtime activities in addition to my full-time job. Since "Dad" lives thousands of miles away, and only visits his children every few months or so, I rarely if ever get a break. Do I regret having adopted my children? No way! They are the sunshine in my day, and the best things that ever happened to me. This has been a particularly difficult winter as the three of us have had a myriad of illnesses ranging from sinus infections to bronchitis. If only spring would get here. Then at least, going outside would be more bearable, and the cold season will be beyond us.

Chinese Dresses

2009-01-23T05:46:00.003-06:00

The lovely dresses my daughters are wearing in the main photo were purchased at Lucy's in Guangzhou, outside of the White Swan. How I wish Guangzhou wasn't a 16 hour plane ride! If it were closer, I would go back and buy my daughters more lovely dresses. If anyone knows where to purchase Chinese dresses here in the United States, please let me know.

Ashley

Seven

2009-01-21T17:46:00.004-06:00

Here's a recap of my week so far:

1) I was happy to see Barack Obama become sworn in as our 44th president.

2) I finally finished a case-study that took forever to write.

3) Big Sister and I are getting over another round of winter illnesses.

4) Little Sister is healthy for a change!

5) Little Sister is on week 3 of wearing big girl panties and having few accidents.

6) I stepped out of my comfort zone and joined Facebook.

7) The ex is out of work again. (Job #7 lost!)

Weekly Update

2009-01-10T15:36:00.003-06:00

Here are the highlights of my week:

-Little Sister did an awesome job wearing her big girl (Elmo) panties all week, with only a few accidents here and there.

-I lost 4 pounds in two weeks, watching what I eat, detoxing, and getting on my treadmill again. (It's been two years!)

-My "To Do" List became much shorter this week.

-The "Ex" and I are having better conversations lately.

-We found our lost library video and returned it.

Ashley

-FROM A FRIEND-

Natural Child: Any child who is not artificial.
Real Parent: Any parent who is not imaginary.
Your Own Child: Any child who is not someone else's child.
Adopted Child: A natural child, with a real parent, who is all my own.

--- Rita Laws, PhD

Potty Progress

2009-01-06T05:57:00.006-06:00

Yesterday, I sent a note to Little Sister's daycare asking if she could wear big girl panties on Fridays. Her teachers sent me a nice note, telling me that wearing big girl panties only one day a week is too confusing for a child, but if I feel she is ready to wear them, they will happily assist me. Last night, I talked it over with Little Sister, asking her if she would like to wear big girl panties all the time. She jumped up and down, and yelled, "Yes, now!" So, after her bath, she wore them around the house until bedtime. Today, I am sending her to school for the first time in big girl panties. After nearly 8 months of potty training, I think we are ready for this next step. Wish us luck!

PS. Thanks to all who wrote me about ear tubes, and home remedies. I am going to speak with our pediatrician in two weeks. I truly appreciate all of your kind words and good advice. Ashley

Happy Holidays!

2008-12-23T18:03:00.001-06:00

Wishing all of my cyber friends a very Merry Christmas.

Love,
Ashley

Ear Tubes?

2008-12-19T06:16:00.002-06:00

Little Sister is sick again! Over the past two years, she has had many colds and upper respiratory illnesses, especially ear infections. Now, one of the doctor's in her pediatrician's office has recommended ear tubes. I want to talk with her primary pediatrician first to see what is involved, and if this procedure is needed. If you have any advice on the subject, please let me know. Thanks!

Ashley

Since moving to the Midwest

2008-12-16T05:52:00.003-06:00

Having been raised in the Eastern states of New York and Pennslvania, I thought I knew what cold weather was like, but now I know better. Over the last year, I have made the following observations about Chicagoland in the winter months:

1) Winter starts early and ends late.

2) It takes a blizzard for businesses and schools to close early.

3) There is no such thing as a delayed school day.

4) We are currently experiencing a deep freeze.

5) 40 degree days feel like Heaven.

6) Now, I know why Illinois is the land of Starbucks. Hot drinks warm the soul!

Big Sister is a winner!

2008-12-15T05:35:00.002-06:00

Since my oldest daughter loves to draw, we decided to have her enter a book poster contest. Before she started, I asked her to pick out one of her favorite books, and use that as her main theme. She choose Chicka Chicka Boom Boom. On Friday, she was presented with a certificate for creating the most original poster in her grade. She was thrilled as you can imagine. One of her classmates who also entered the contest was jealous and angry, and told Big Sister that her poster was ugly. The teacher overheard and gave the little girl a time out. Then, she had to apologize.

Uncles are nice!

2008-12-11T05:35:00.005-06:00

My brother-in-law is one of the most caring people I know. He is an excellent husband to my sister, a loving father to my nieces, and a wonderful uncle to my children. He's a big kid at heart, and all of the kids adore him. Sometimes, he lets them climb on his back which always invokes big smiles, laughter, and 100% participation as the photos show.

The Nutcracker

2008-12-09T05:33:00.002-06:00

Last weekend, as an early Christmas gift, I took my six-year-old daughter to see The Nutcracker. Like me, she was mesmerized by the engaging music, beautiful costumes, and stunning dance performances. The performance was given by the North Shore Dance Company, and held at a nearby high school. We arrived a few minutes late, literally moments before the show started which turned out to be a blessing in disguise because instead of the seats we were assigned, way in the back, they let us sit in the box row, near the stages where we could see every move clearly. It was nothing short of magical. I can't wait until Little Sister is old enough to join us. Then, we will go and relieve the magic once again.

Bedtime Fun

2008-12-03T05:29:00.004-06:00

When I was little, my sister and I shared a beautiful room together.It had deep purple carpeting, pink, flowered wallpaper, and white canopy beds. Many happy memories were spent in our bedroom, talking, giggling, and cuddling. Now, I get to see the joy of my own two girls, happily sharing a room of their own.

My Gratitude List

2008-11-26T17:05:00.004-06:00

With Thanksgiving tomorrow, I thought I would update my list of things I am thankful for. Here they are:

*Realizing my dream of becoming a mother, and having two beautiful daughters.
*Having a rewarding job that allows me to teach and praise my students daily.
*Family and friends
*Good health
*The Starbucks that is located halfway between the two buildings I work at
*Chocolate
*Netflix, a single mother's best friend
*God who continues to bless me every day

Family Dinner Week and Fall Festivities

2008-11-19T17:11:00.007-06:00

Last night, we had family dinner night at my daughters' Montessori. It was catered by a local Italian restaurant. We had a nice time enjoying the good food and company. I was able to meet some of my daughters friends as well as their parents. On Friday, Big Sister's kindergarten class will be hosting a Thanksgiving family feast with another meal, and a concert performed by the children. I love this time of year with all of the special festivities. We have many eating events in my school as well, including a weekly Wednesday breakfast. Two teachers sign up each week to present their special breakfast to the rest of the team. It's something we all look forward to, and helps us get through the week.

Blankie, Blankie, I love you!

2008-11-17T17:31:00.003-06:00

When my two-year-old was asked what she is thankful for, she told her teacher this:

1) Blankie
2) Momma
3) Sissy

Once again, Blankie comes in first. Like Linus, the original Blankie Boy, Little Sister simply loves her fabric companion.

Celebrating Six!

2008-11-10T16:18:00.002-06:00

We've been celebrating Big Sister's sixth birthday over the past few week and a half with a family party, kid party, and a mommy and daughter outing to see Madagascar II. Here are some photos from our fun time together. I think adoptive families have more celebrations because we missed out on so much before we got them. At least, that is the case with me. I love to celebrate every little occasion with my two beauties.

Under the weather

2008-11-08T06:51:00.003-06:00

Sorry I haven't posted in a while, but last weekend, I got hit with a virus. My throat was on fire, my glands felt like the size of basketballs, and I have a cough. To make matters worse, I have had laryngitis now for four days. My voice is coming back, but still not there. It sounds like I have a little frog living inside. Today, is Big Sister's 6th birthday party. I will hopefully have some speaking voice by 2:30 p.m., and will write a more eloquent update later with photos of my big girl.

Happy Halloween!

2008-10-31T05:48:00.000-05:00

Scenes from a library

2008-10-30T06:06:00.002-05:00

We love going to the library. It's actually been one of my favorite places since I was a little girl. Someday, when I'm old, I want to work in a library, and be surrounded by books. I know it sounds crazy, but the library has always felt like a home away from home for me. I love reading! I love books! I wish I had time to read more, but with a full-time job and raising two little girls alone, I don't have enough time. Many of our playdates are held at the library such as the photo shows. The boy is one of Big Sister's best pals (Ian) and also featured is his new baby brother born last July.

A Prayer for Mother

2008-10-27T18:39:00.004-05:00

My mother is pictured the second to the right. She left this earth nearly 3 1/2 years ago, and I still think of her and miss her each day. The photos shows her enjoying a happy family reunion. Mom loved spending time with family and friends. She was, and continues to be an inspiration to me. I only wish she could have been here to meet my youngest daughter, and my sisters children as well. The prayer below is dedicated in her memory.

For a Mother who has died

Dear Lord, relying on your promises to us, I turn to you in trust that my mother is with you and that she is enjoying your loving embrace. You alone know how she loved the best she could and how she faithfully endured the struggles that she faced. You know the graces you gave her and you know the grace she was for me and for so many. For all the ways she truly loved the way you loved her, please reward her, Lord. May she enjoy the communion of all her family and friends who are with you.

Lord, I know my mother still loves us who are still here on earth. I ask you that you might listen to her fervent prayers for us. Help me to grow into a new and deeper relationship with my mother now, as I long for the day when we will both meet in your embrace - freed from all that might have hindered our relationship on earth, knowing and understanding everything we did not know or understand on this earth.

I ask you this with faith in the resurrection, trusting my mother's love, and desiring that she know my love for her. Amen.

**********************************************************

Too funny not to share

2008-10-25T21:05:00.002-05:00

Happy HALF BIRTHDAY Little Sister!

2008-10-23T05:57:00.004-05:00

A few weeks ago, Little Sister turned 2 1/2. Here are some photos of our celebration. The amazing cupcakes were made by our local bakery. They taste as good as they look.

Book Recommendation

2008-10-19T06:59:00.010-05:00

Most adoptive parents have an idealized image of their child's orphanage. They desperately want to believe that someone in China loved and cared for their child before adoption day. They may envision a favorite nanny who came to work each day, seeking out their future child, giving them kisses and kind words. When adoptive families receive their referrals, and join up with orphanage boards, they are often reassured that their child comes from a nice, clean, caring environment.

In March 2007, when I got my referral for Little Sister, I immediately joined the XXXX orphanage group so that I could find out more about the babies and be better prepared. I was given glowing reports that gave me temporary reassurance that all of the babies were "well cared for and healthy." You can only imagine my surprise then when Gotcha day rolls around, and I am given a terrified baby, one who intensely fears the night, and would scream for hours on end, accepting no form of comfort. I went into complete shock, not knowing or understanding what the problem was. Didn't my orphanage group reassure me that ALL of the babies were treated well. When I had my facilitator call the orphanage to find out what was wrong, the orphanage director sarcastically reported that my baby was, "spoiled by her nanny." For months following our stay in China, and our return home, life was hell. My child who came from a highly-regarded orphanage of loving and well-meaning nannies was jealous of her big sister, fearful at every turn, and full of rage. At one point, I wondered if she was mentally insane. I wrote my orphanage group several times, voicing my concerns, and was constantly told how "wonderful their daughters were adjusting." Finally, two other mothers with babies from the same orphanage, quietly came forward, emailing me on the sly, admitting that their babies were also severely traumatized.

Now, after delving into Silent Tears: A Journey of Hope in a Chinese Orphanage, I finally have confirmation that my daughter was indeed maltreated by the nannies who took care of her in the XXXX orphanage. I had always suspected, but now I know the truth. Author, Kay Bratt, possibly a pen name, and her family spent a few years living in China. During that time, Kay volunteered at a local orphanage where she
witnessed first-hand cruel and careless treatment of Chinese orphans.

Here is an excerpt from the book:

"The babies' diet is appalling and equally atrocious for the other orphanage children. For breakfast, they have rice with greens mixed in. For lunch, they have greens with rice mixed in. For supper, it's rice and greens. It doesn't look that bad, but no one would want it for every meal. Clearly, they get sick of it because there are a few who spit it back out even though their hunger is evident. It appears to be an act of defiance, so we simple keep shoveling it in because we know they won't be allowed to eat again for several hours."

I highly recommend this book for anyone waiting for a child from China. I only wish I had read this book before I adopted Little Sister. It may have helped me better understand why she was so fearful and moody. I eventually figured it out, but it was huge adjustment for us both.

Chart Crazy

2008-10-14T20:09:00.003-05:00

Little Sister started off with one potty chart. Now, she has three more charts, one for whining, one for her tantrums, and one for calming herself down. Why all the charts you may be asking? Well, it could have something to do with the fact that I am a teacher, and teachers are notorious for loving charts. The main reason however is because I simply can't stand the whining anymore. The combination of being "2" and having a speech delay creates a monotonous series of daily whining in Little Sister's world. I tried time-outs, and they simply don't work. They stop the behavior for a few minutes, but they don't change it. She still whines so now I've decided to try to catch her being good, and work hard for the reward which happens to be a sticker each time she gets through a day without exhibiting 'bad' behavior.

Today, my little darling earned four stickers. One for each of her charts. Yeh, she didn't whine today! No whining means no tantrums! Hurray! I can end my day with happy satisfaction knowing that some progress was made. Let's hope that tomorrow is another winning day for Shugs and I.

My Favorite Things

2008-10-12T07:33:00.007-05:00

Following the lead of my beautiful daughters, I have decided to share a list of things I adore and don't particularly care for these days. Here they are:

Ashley's Favorites

1. Starbuck's hot chocolate with a pump of peppermint
2. M&M peanuts
3. Waking up in the morning before my kids
4. Spring, Summer, and Fall (hate winter)
5. Curling up with a good book
6. Going to the movies
7. Shopping
8. Getting a massage
9. Blogging
10. My kids

Things I Don't Like:

1) Aggressive drivers
2) Being late
3) When our home is a mess
4) Potty training (necessary, but not fun!)
5) The dark days of winter
6) When people ask me if my daughters are "real sisters"
7) Snakes, lizards, mice
8) Extreme temperatures
9) Kids who try to cut ahead of mine in line
10)When my kids are whining or fighting

Big Sister's Favorite Things

2008-10-09T07:24:00.003-05:00

Big Sister will be six in a few weeks. Yikes! Where did my baby go? Wasn't it only yesterday that I first held her, and brought her home from China? Now, she's in kindergarten, going to sleep unders, and solving math problems. Actually, Big Sister has been solving math problems since she was three. Here are more of her favorite things.

Big Sister's Favorites:

1) Math
2) Disney Princesses
3) Watching T.V.
4) Her sister
5) Dressing up in play clothes
6) Gymnastics
7) Barbie
8) Play dates
9) Cookies (especially from our local bakery)
10) Mommy

Big Sister Doesn't Like:

1) Most vegetables
2) Scary Stuffy (witches, clowns, ghosts, etc.)
3) Bugs
4) Getting her hair washed
5) Liam (a little boy in her class)
6) Sister grabbing things out of her hand
7) Bugs
8) Making her bed
9) bugs
10) Being too hot

Blog Spotlight

2008-10-07T17:26:00.003-05:00

Today, I was contacted by Adoptive Families, and notified that they like my blog, and are posting it under one of their "favorites." How cool is that? Just when I thought no one was reading, something spectacular happened. Thank you Adoptive Families, you truly made my day. I love your magazine, and feel extremely honored to be recognized.

Little Sister's Favorite Things

2008-10-06T18:55:00.005-05:00

Little Sister will officially turn 2 1/2 on October 12th. We are going to celebrate her half birthday this coming weekend. In honor of the event, I am updating her list of favorite things. Preferences do change over time, especially when you are TWO.

Favorite Things

1) Thomas the Train
2) Choo Choos of any kind
3) Cookie Monster
4) Cookies (especially from our local bakery)
5) Going to play school every day (a.k.a. Montessori)
6) Yogurt, especially banana yogurt
7) Mac & Cheese
8) Baths, especially bubble baths
9) Wearing her blue pajamas
10) Momma

In case you are wondering, here are 10 things LS hates:

1) Vegetables of every kind
2) Pooping on the potty (not the most pleasant subject)
3) Having her hair washed
4) When her whining doesn't work
5) Time-outs
6) Being without her blankie
7) Getting her hands dirty
8) Scary stuff (like puppets or clowns)
9) Sharing her toys
10) Sharing Momma

Deep into the Terrific Twos!

2008-09-28T19:11:00.002-05:00

Yes, my friends, we are deep into the terrible , er, um, terrific twos! Little sister literally whines, demands, gets angry, and then cries all day long. Whatever her sister or I have, she wants it. The item could be a glass of water, toy, pen, cell phone, etc. It goes something like this....

LS: (Seeing Mommy using a pen), "Pen?"

ME: I will get you a pencil in a minute.

LS: "No, pen."

ME: "Wait just a minute, and I will get you a pencil."

LS: "No, pen, pen, pen, pen, pen....."

ME: "Stop whining and demanding now. If you stop, I will get you a pencil. No pens."

LS: (Getting visably angry) "Pen, pen, pen, pen, pen....."

ME: You are going to have a time-out until you stop whining and demanding things.

It goes on all day long, and for the record, I don't always deny her something, especially food or drink, but she is completely impatient and wants to be catered to 24/7. I know it's the age, but it can be exhausting. On the bright side, her sense of humor keeps me laughing, and for that I am very thankful.

2008-09-21T19:22:00.004-05:00

Weekly Update

2008-09-20T05:32:00.002-05:00

THE KIDS:

My girls started Montessori this past week. Big Sister, who adapts well to anything, did fine. She still attends public kindergarten, but goes to the Montessori afterward for enrichment. Little Sister who doesn't like change or transitions, did remarkably well overall. She did a few crying outbursts throughout the week, but they were relatively short, and the teachers reported that she did eat and sleep with the other kids.

MY JOB:

For those of us who teach, we know that our profession is not a high-paying one, but we go into it to make a difference. At least that's what I did. For the first time in my teaching career, I feel like I am accomplishing that goal. I am working with mostly minority students (who will soon be the majority). Most of my students are Hispanic in grades 6-8. I also have a few Asian, Caucasian, and Arabic. The diversity of staff and students is a wonderful, positive experience.

First Day of Kindergarten Photos - August 27th

2008-09-18T06:05:00.000-05:00

Childcare Update

2008-09-06T20:19:00.002-05:00

When Plan A and B don't work out, what do you do? You switch to Plan C of course. That's where I am now. I have found it to be extremely difficult to hire a full-time nanny. The majority of potentials that I spoke to want a lot of money to watch your kids. Their fee can range anywhere from $10 - $25 per hour, depending upon your neighborhood, their experience, and the number of children you have. The other issue is trust. Can you truly trust someone who isn't a friend or relative to be alone for 9-10 hours a day with your children? It's not easy which is why I have decided to send my kids to Montessori. Big Sister will attend Montessori after kindergarten at her elementary school, and Little Sister will go there from 9-4 each day. I have hired a full-time, early-morning nanny to get the kids dressed and ready for their day. She will give them breakfast and take one to her bus stop, and the other to daycare. Even better, this nanny already works for my sister from 9:30 to 3:30 p.m. M-F. I am feeling much better this weekend. Thanks for all your prayers and encouragement.

She's Gone!

2008-09-01T19:49:00.003-05:00

I fired Mona this weekend. When I called to tell her, she didn't seem to care. I think that just goes along with her overall blase attitude about life. I spent my Labor Day weekend interviewing more potential nannies, and narrowed it down to two potentials, one I really like a lot. I am going to call for references tomorrow and see what happens. In the meantime, our summer babysitter and her mom are going to help me out with the kids until I find a caring, responsible nanny for my kids.

The Nanny Diaries

2008-08-30T07:01:00.004-05:00

Right after I was hired in early June, I quickly secured daycare for my children. It wasn't an easy task, especially since Big Sister goes to kindergarten half days and needs both before and after-school care. She was going to early morning care at her school, and then would have taken a bus to a local Montessori in the afternoon. Little Sister was going to come with me everyday to our on-site daycare facility. At the end of July, early August, only a few weeks before school started, I called the daycare facility where I work just to confirm things, and was told that they lost my paperwork, and didn't have a spot left. You have no idea what an upheaval that created. I had to quickly check out other facilities, but could not find a situation that would allow me to be at my job on time every day, 7:30 a.m. I wound up spending one entire weekend interviewing nannies, and hired one. She lasted one day. Mabel (not her real name), an older woman, who knew it all and was the "BEST" arrived and immediately started giving me her two cents on everything. The worst part was when she didn't think Big Sister (age 5 1/2) needed any supervision at the park, and could go to a separate park away from her little sister on her own. After that, she was gone.

Next came a Romanian woman, referred by a friend of a friend whom I was told would care for the children "like her own and work hard." Both turned out to be untrue. Mona (not her real name) has ZERO personality. She interviewed well and seemed happy and sweet, but within a few days, showed her true colors. First of all, she refuses to follow my simple directions like feeding my kids healthy meals. I spent 30 minutes one day creating a meal chart of what foods to prepare for breakfast, lunch, and snacks. She followed it for two days and then stopped,and has been continually feeding them M&M's all day. She even put M&M's in their Jello one day. When she empties my dishwasher, she shoves clean stuff wherever, including silverware How hard is it to put the spoons with the spoons, and the forks with the forks. Rather, she just throws everything in there. The worst part about Mona is her lack of empathy for my kids. When they cry over Mommy leaving in the morning, she stands back and laughs at them. I have also heard that she spends her days laying on my couch. I am really upset over this and want her gone NOW. Of course, life isn't that easy. I have to find someone else first. I am going to interview four more potential nannies this weekend. Wish me luck and send those much needed prayers.

My Little Hams

2008-08-29T05:39:00.001-05:00

Here are my two little hams playing it up for the camera. Unfortunately, my photos aren't coming out crystal clear. I have a Cannon Powershot G5, if anyone wants to give me some advice. I do have the user guide around here somewhere... Anyway, as you can see, Little Sister is quite the comedian. She has many facial expressions that she can pull out of a hat at any time. I love her sense of humor. Big Sister and I are always laughing!

Three Word Sunday

2008-08-24T06:37:00.003-05:00

Weekends Are Nice!

She Who Laughs

2008-08-23T06:14:00.002-05:00

It's so important to have a sense of humor, and not take life too seriously. That's what I am trying to do. In our school district, 30 new teachers were hired, all of them female, except for one. Early in the week, we had new teacher training. The energy and enthusiasm in the room was great. On Thursday, the rest of the staff returned, and suddenly the climate began to change. Now, we have a mixture of energetic, motivated newcomers (including myself), and some of the typical, "I hate my job, and life sucks" veteran teachers. I'm not saying that all veteran teachers are like this. Some are phenomenal, but there are those who suck the energy out of the room with their pessimism. One of my goals is to not take anything they say too personally, and to go with the flow. Wish me luck!

Week 1 of my new job

2008-08-21T20:09:00.002-05:00

I went back to work this week full-time after taking a three-year break to stay at home with my children. Aside from missing my girls, I am enjoying the job so far. My position is a Literacy Intervention Specialist for grades six through eight in a very diverse school district. We have over 54 spoken languages here. I love the diversity! It is so nice to see beautiful, colorful faces in the hallway. More later...

Three Word Sunday

2008-08-17T08:08:00.005-05:00

Chocolate Covered Almonds

Dove makes the best! They are rich and delicious, and melt in your mouth.

The Butterfly Princess and Little Miss Ladybug

2008-08-13T23:08:00.004-05:00

Once upon a time, there lived two beautiful little princesses. The eldest had silky black hair and almond eyes with perfect shaped eyebrows, and a smile that could light up an entire room. Her enthusiasm and zest for life were her greatest gifts. Other children were naturally drawn to her vivacious personality. The youngest princess was a bit more shy, taking a little longer to warm-up to new situations. She needs to feel secure in her environment and with new people, but once you climb into her inner circle, you will find that one of her greatest gifts is her sense of humor. Her hair is thick and beautiful. She has inquisitive eyes and pouty,full lips. Little sister will definitely grow to become one of the great pranksters of our time, yet, her highest quality is laughter. For a child who was once deeply saddened, her laughter is like a symphony of mellifluous tunes, playing sweetly on a summer night. Deep and hearty, her laughter comes, filling the room with a most beautiful sound. Her happiness, finally found.

Girls on a train

2008-08-11T06:31:00.001-05:00

My sister and I took our girls on a train ride to Chicago a few weeks ago. As you can see, they truly enjoyed it. Maybe, it was the good company!

Three Word Sunday

2008-08-10T06:56:00.002-05:00

2008 Summer Olympics

Work countdown

2008-08-06T20:33:00.002-05:00

I officially return to work full-time in less than two weeks. I can't believe that it's August already. Where did the summer go? It seems like just yesterday we went to the pool for the first time this year, and now, the summer is winding down. It's been a busy one, filled with preparing for my new job as a reading specialist. This will be my first year working in this capacity. Prior to this, I taught middle school language arts. I feel good though. I am very prepared, organized, and ready to go. My main stress this summer has been developing a good childcare plan for my daughters. Since I begin my job so early in the morning (7:30 a.m.), I need someone to care for my big girl before and after kindergarten. I thought everything was set weeks ago. I had her scheduled for before care at her elementary school, and she was going to do an enrichment program in a local Montessori after-school. My little one was going to come with me to our on-site daycare facility within my school district. It was all arranged, or at least, that's what I thought until I called the on site facility to confirm everything, and was told that they lost my paperwork causing us to lose Little Sister's (LS) spot. With these change of events, my stress level went way up. My next plan was to put LS in another daycare. I visited a few, but found dirty facilities, outrageous prices, and inadequate start-times. I finally decided to look for a full-time nanny to come early in the morning, get my big girl off to kindergarten, and spend time with LS. Last weekend, I interviewed ten candidates, and wasn't too impressed with the majority of them. Finally, I met someone that I feel very comfortable with. She was the first candidate who immediately wanted to meet my children. She greeted them, hugged them, and talked with them. Rachel starts next week so that I can observe her with my kids, and help us all adjust. I'm praying that she works out because I really need someone to help me out with the kids, especially since their dad lives several states away.

More party photos

2008-08-01T06:32:00.002-05:00

Here are more pictures from my niece's first birthday party last week.

Happy Birthday KJ!

2008-07-28T06:27:00.014-05:00

July is the month of birthdays in my family. My siblings and I are all born in July. My nephew celebrated his 21st birthday on July 6th, and my youngest niece will turn one on Wednesday, July 30th. My sister and brother-in-law celebrated her birthday this past weekend with a party. My daughters especially loved the chocolate cupcakes, and spending time with their cousins and new friends. At 12 months, my amazing niece, KJ, is walking (trying to keep up with her big sister), eating big kid food (like pasta and bread), and beginning to talk. I've even heard her say, "Auntie" a few times even though my sister doesn't believe me. Here are a few photos of my darling niece:

KJ loves shoes!

KJ and me at her party.

Animal crackers are her favorite.

Standing with her cousin, Little Sister.

Stares and dumb questions

2008-07-27T20:17:00.005-05:00

When you are out with your family, do you ever get stares? We get them all the time. They seem to have increased with the addition of my second daughter. The 'cold' stares as I like to call them aren't always from Caucasian people, they can also come from Asians, especially Chinese women. The stares don't necessarily bother me. Two gorgeous Chinese daughters walking around with me all day is like having a moonbeam on my shoulder. They bless me with their presence, and I am forever grateful to be their mother. Yet, I often wonder how they will react when the moment of awakening comes for them. That moment when they realize that the majority of children look like their parents. How will they handle the cold stares and invasive questions. Today, while shopping in Target, the cashier, a woman, asked me in front of my daughters and another customer if the girls were mine or adopted. I looked at her and said, "They are mine AND they are adopted. I am their forever mommy." The cashier, trying to save face, replied, "Oh, that's what I meant."

Potty Training Update

2008-07-22T19:03:00.002-05:00

For the past several weeks, I have been in phase 2 of Little Sister's potty training. Phase 1 began several months ago. Back then, she sporadically used her potty. Now, I am happy to report that she is consistently using her potty anywhere from 1-4 times per day. We are getting there! Progress is being made. I attribute it to the introduction of a new motivator, M&M's. Little Sister especially loves the blue ones! Each time she deposits something in her potty, she gets one. She knows that the only time we can eat them is if she goes in her potty. The next step will be to try having her wear underwear and/or training pants, if I can find them. I also need to get into the habit of asking her to use the potty when we are out. I've done it a few times, but haven't been as consistent as I need to be with that. Wish me luck as the journey continues.

Three Word Sunday

2008-07-20T08:05:00.004-05:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELLY!

Yesterday, we celebrated my little sister's birthday. The two of us went for a massage in the afternoon. I had a hot stone massage which was heavenly. Kelly had a signature massage. It was nice to get out by ourselves for a little while, a rare treat. Later, Kelly and her family came over to our place for dinner. We enjoyed baked manicotti, salad, and strawberry shortcake.

Famous Adoptees

2008-07-19T07:29:00.003-05:00

Faith Daniels, TV News Personality

Melissa Gilbert, Actress

Sara MacLachlan, Musician/Singer

Jim Palmer, Pro Baseball Player

Dave Thomas, Founder/Wendy's

Anthony Williams, D.C. Mayor

Cute Moment

2008-07-16T20:01:00.002-05:00

My father has been visiting with us over the past 2 weeks. A few days ago, this happened . . .

BIG SISTER: "Papa, how old was Mommy when you adopted her?"

PAPA: "Three, I think."

--30 minutes later--

PAPA: "Ashley, Big Sister asked how old you were when I adopted you."

ME: "What did you say, Dad?"

PAPA: "I told her you were three."

ME: "Why did you say that when I'm not really adopted."

PAPA: "I thought I'd leave the explaining up to you."

Summer Splash at the Pool

2008-07-14T06:11:00.003-05:00

Three Word Sunday

2008-07-13T08:10:00.001-05:00

Who Needs Shoes?

My adorable nieces.

2008-07-07T06:47:00.001-05:00

The little one is just starting to walk on her own. Check it out!

Three Word Sunday

2008-07-06T06:39:00.000-05:00

I LOVE SUMMER!

God Bless the U.S.A. by Lee Greenwood

2008-07-04T06:55:00.001-05:00

Happy July 4th!

Happy Birthday to Me

2008-07-01T07:25:00.003-05:00

In honor of my birthday, I have posted some of my favorite flowers. Since we live close to a botanical garden, my daughters and I go there often and enjoy seeing these and many other exquisite flowers and trees.

Flowers: poenies, tulips, oriental poppies, water lillies, and sunflower

Mommy goes back to work

2008-06-30T06:50:00.003-05:00

I loved staying home with my daughters, and having the time to take them to Mommy & Me classes, the park, the library, or just be home together on a cold winter day. The time has come for me to return to work. Big Sister will be starting kindergarten in the fall, and Little Sister will accompany me to school every day as we have our own on-site daycare center. I will be working as a reading specialist for grades 6-8 at a nearby school district. My new job officially begins at the end of August. Everything has been arranged, including before-school and after-school care for Big Sister. Still, it will be a huge change for us all. I wonder if any of the other working moms out there have any advice for me. Can you offer any tips on making the transition smooth or how to get everyone up dressed, fed, and out the door by a very early hour? Any tips would be greatly appreciated.

Three Word Sunday

2008-06-29T08:23:00.003-05:00

Potty Training Blues

Just as round 2 of our potty training session begins, so does Little Sister's ability to clearly say her new favorite word, "NO!" Despite the "No's," she is peeing in her potty pretty consistently. More updates to follow.

Hummingbirds and Faith

2008-06-26T06:04:00.006-05:00

When we adopt our child, the painful memories of waiting seem to melt away like snow basking in the sun. Life becomes busy. Responsibilities change, and our patience is tested in a new way. In my October LID group, there is still one couple who have not yet received their baby. After all this time, they are still in the waiting phase due to a complication with their paperwork. Theresa (not her real name) has sat back and watched members of our group joyfully announce their referrals, share baby pictures and travel plans, post Gotcha Day videos, and even complain about the hardships of being a new mother. She has done all of this with grace, but she is suffering. Her arms are still empty. Another member of our group posted this beautiful psalm offering Theresa courage. I thought it was perfect and wanted to share it with all of my readers who may also still be waiting. Where does the hummingbird come into play? It doesn't really. Only that they are one of my favorite birds, delicate and extraordinary gifts from God. I want to tell Theresa that God will grant her wish. He's listening.

"Faith is the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction of things yet unseen."
Hebrews 11:1

Summer joy

2008-06-25T05:51:00.002-05:00

Kung Fu Panda

2008-06-22T07:01:00.002-05:00

Last Friday, I took Big Sister and her friend to see the movie, Kung Fu Panda. The girls hadn't seen each other since preschool ended a few weeks earlier so they were eager to get together. Little Sister was home with a babysitter. She is still too young for the movie theater. The movie which features the voices of Jack Black, Dustin Hoffman, Jackie Chan, and Angelina Jolie, was well-done. I think I laughed even more than the kids. I especially enjoyed the scenery of China, and seeing the animals perform their martial arts. Who knew that a praying mantis could fight so well? The film does include two obvious cases of adoption, but they are not addressed, only assumed by the adult viewer. When I asked Big Sister later on if the panda could really be the bird's son, she said, "No, it's just pretend for the movie."

It was a great week

2008-06-16T07:53:00.003-05:00

Last week couldn't have been better. I finally found a full-time teaching position only 30 minutes from my home. It's for a middle school reading intervention specialist. I am excited about happy to stop working on those tedious and time-consuming teaching applications. On Saturday, my girls and I met with my single mom's group. We all share the common bond of having a little girl from China, or waiting for one. Big Sister immediately became fast friends with one of the girls. They were like two peas in a pod, holding hands and inseparable during our time together. It was a great week. The icing on the cake came last night when I finally got to see Kenny Loggins perform live at an outdoor concert. After all these years, he still looks and sounds great. It was a great week. I wish they could all be like that.

Middle Children

2008-06-14T16:29:00.003-05:00

Middle children are used to giving
In to the younger and the older.

Middle children are used to turning
Soft, mild cheeks to the child
who's bolder.

Middle children make cheer
their talent
Smiling even through hand-me-downs.

Middle children will play a
willing audience for the other's
clownings.

Middle children are open-hearted.

Middle children will fetch
and carry.

Middle children don't need
unspoiling.

Middle children are nice to marry.

Author unknown

No Veggies Please

2008-06-13T06:45:00.002-05:00

When I brought Little Sister home last year at 13 months, she had never eaten food before. I know it's hard to believe, but she had only been given bottles for nourishment in her orphanage. Since she missed the infant stages of eating, I started her out on mostly soft foods, including those Gerber jars of fruits and vegetables. No matter what was in the jar, she loved it, including peas, carrots, sweet potatoes, and corn. I also gave her regular table food, but continued with the fruits and veggies until about 19 months. Once I stopped the Gerber jars, she refused ALL vegetables. I still try to give her vegetables with every meal. I've even boiled, mashed and mushed them down, but she still hates them all. Can anyone out there give me some advice?

Favorites from China

2008-06-08T19:14:00.036-05:00

With so many families still waiting for their referrals from China, including one good friend, I thought I would share some highlights from both of my trips. In 2003, I traveled to Guangxi Province, staying in Nanning and Guilin, to adopt my first baby girl. The trip was magical. We flew into Hong Kong and toured the magnificant city one day, and then took another plane to Nanning, where are babies were waiting for us. We spent a few days in Nanning, finalizing the adoption, and then traveled by bus to Guilin, the birthplace of Big Sister. Guilin was incredibly beautiful.

Last May (2007), I traveled again to China to adopt my second baby, beginning my trip once again in Hong Kong. My best friend and I decided to leave a few days early so that we could further explore Hong Kong. She loves jade and enjoyed visiting some of the jewelry stores in the city. I especially enjoyed touring Po Lin Monestary on Lantau Island. It was lovely. Unlike the first trip in 2003, our travel group only went from Hong Kong to Guangzhou, giving us two full weeks at the White Swan and plenty of time to shop.

Here are a few highlights from each of my trips. I hope my readers enjoy them.

FAVORITE SPOT #1 (Guilin countryside in Guangxi Province, birthplace of Big Sister.)

FAVORITE SPOT #2 (Po Lin Monastery on Lantau Island in Hong Kong). You can get there by car or cable. If you are afraid of heights, I don't recommend the cable because the cars are very small and they travel very high up in the mountain. We opted for the taxi which was a harrowing experience too with drivers who speed like lightening through the winding roads. Once we got there, we were happy to have made the journey, but we looked for an older, calmer driver for the way back down.

BEST LUNCH CHOICE #1: (If you are craving American food, try the club sandwich and French fries from the White Swan Hotel cafe. If you don't mind a little hard-boiled egg on your sandwich, it is delicious! You can sit by the pool if the weather is nice and order it there too.)

BEST LUNCH CHOICE #2: (From the Po Lin Monastery in Hong Kong, my traveling companion and I enjoyed a delicious vegetarian meal of fresh steamed vegetables, mushroom soup, and spring rolls. The spring rolls were some of the best I have ever had.)

FAVORITE FINDS FOR CHILDREN:

SQUEAKY SHOES (They come in every color and are extremely cheap so buy as many as you can. They make great gifts for friends too!)

Hello Kitty Utensil Sets (includes chopsticks)

FAVORITE FINDS FOR ADULTS:

(PEARL FACTORY) - Guangzhou has many pearl factories where they will hand string beautiful pearl necklaces, bracelets and earrings while you wait, all reasonably priced.

Japanese wooden dolls

BEST MOMENT:

Gotcha Day (February 11, 2003 with my ex-husband)

Adoption Day: (May 16, 2007)

Now that I have shared my favorite memories from China, I would like to invite (tag) some of my friends to share highlights of their adoption journey.

Meredith Teagarden
http://notsolongago.blogspot.com/

Connie
http://mommy24treasures.blogspot.com/

Sheryl
http://ourredthreadjourney.blogspot.com/

Two princesses enjoying a lovely spring day

2008-06-04T06:49:00.002-05:00

Remembering Mei Mei's Arrival

2008-06-03T06:28:00.004-05:00

Zhi Bin's referral photo, holding the puzzle piece.

On March 7, 2007, the Fed Ex truck arrived carrying the most precious 'package' imaginable, Little Sister's photo and referral information. "She's here, she's here," cried her big sister, anxious to see what was inside. The package was opened. Inside lay three photos of beautiful Zhi-Bin, appropriately named to suit her "gracefulness and intelligence." Suddenly, the dream became a reality. Little Sister went from being a possibility to a real child, 11 months old. Her paperwork revealed that she became excited when the nannies brought in her bottle, and that she was known to steal toys from the other children. We later found out that both were indeed very true. Two months later, the woman boarded a plane to China. She was happy and knew that in a few, short days, she would hold her new baby daughter.

Just one more. . .

2008-06-02T05:43:00.004-05:00

When the woman returned home with her baby girl from China, she praised God for giving her such a sweet, loving child. Each day was filled with wonderment as she watched her little girl enjoy the simplicities of life, walking barefoot on the grass, picking flowers, chasing butterflies, or playing with an empty bucket which she creatively used as a hat. Mother and child were happy and content. Just one more baby girl thought the mother. One more daughter to love. One little sister to join our family. With that thought, the paperwork was completed and her dossier was sent off to China. Then, the waiting began. One year trickled by and still no baby. The next year arrived, and the waiting continued. Will I ever see the face of my second daughter cried the woman one night? Is this ever going to happen she asked herself. It didn't seem to help either that celebrities Angela Jolie and Brad Pitt were building their own family at rapid speed, seemingly bringing home a new baby on a yearly basis while the woman waited for one more. The wait was intense, but miraculously, the day finally arrived when a Fed Ex truck pulled up to her front door and handed her a package containing information about her new baby.

To be continued . . .

Remembering my first trip to China

2008-05-31T06:29:00.005-05:00

Once upon a time, there was a woman who dreamt of becoming a mommy. In her dreams, she would envision herself walking hand-in-hand with a beautiful, happy little girl. Years passed, and still she waited for God to grant her wish. In her heart, she knew that somehow a baby would be hers to love. Her desire to be a mother was so strong, and her determination even stronger. A few years later, the woman received a phone call from her adoption agency, letting her know that soon her wish would be granted, God heard her prayers. Somewhere in China, a baby needed a home. Within a few weeks, a package arrived from China. In that moment, her prayers were answered. She became a mother. The baby was perfect, a little girl with big, brown eyes and a beautiful face. Suddenly, the years of yearning melted away. They were replaced with love and happiness for the future.

Big Sister showing off her nails after Mommy gave her a manicure.

Big Sister at her dance recital. My first baby is now 5 1/2 and will soon start kindergarten. Where does the time go?

Baby Senegal

2008-05-30T06:11:00.003-05:00

My friends, Lauren and Blake, welcomed their first child earlier this week, a baby boy named Senegal. He was born Monday night, on Memorial Day, at 11:18pm. He weighed 7 lbs, 10.5 oz, and was 22 inches long! (*Why Senegal? According to the proud parents, "It's a beautiful, strong, and unusual name, named after a country in West Africa. Blake is very into West African drumming, and Lauren speaks French, the language of Senegal." To find out more about Senegal, here is just one of many websites you can visit: http://www.senegal-tourism.com/).

Congratulations Lauren and Blake on your new son. He is a beautiful baby! I am looking forward to meeting him, and watching him grow.

Love,
Ashley

One year ago today

2008-05-26T20:39:00.007-05:00

China trip, one week after adoption.

Last week, celebrating our Forever Family Day, with her new baby doll and stroller.

One year ago today, on March 26th, I returned from my second, two-week trip to China with a beautiful, yet deeply sad and fearful baby girl. She barely slept in China, and only about three hours on our long fifteen hour flight back to the United States. She was intensely frightened when I got her and angry. Although I had read many books and articles on adoption and attachment, I was completely unprepared for the challenge God gave me. Last summer was rough. She was a clingy, "velcro baby," grabbing onto my shirt collar all day long. I prayed to God, asking for help. He listened and over time, my precious daughter relaxed, learned how to trust me, and became a much calmer, happier child. Now, one year later, she is extremely affectionate and sweet, always wanting to help Mama in any way that she can, especially unloading the bags of groceries. This past weekend, we went to Home Depot to buy carpet cleaner for the steam vacuum and she insisted on carrying the container for me. She is only two-years-old, and the container was quite heavy for her, but she was determined to carry it for me. That's just the way she is with me and her sister, always wanting to help and take care of us. She also has a great sense of humor, one that usually has us in stitches. Out of nowhere, she will make a funny face or sound that will start us laughing. I feel so incredibly blessed to be her mother.

As the old saying goes, a picture tells a thousand words. Here are two photos of my lovely little girl, one from last year, and one from last weekend. I can so clearly see the difference one year of love can make in a child's life. For anyone who has yet to get their referral and meet their new child, please expect the unexpected and know that love will find a way to help your little flower blossom.

David Cook wins American Idol

2008-05-22T02:36:00.004-05:00

The battle of the Davids ended last night when David Cook won the title of the new American Idol. Host, Ryan Seacrest, said that Cook one by "12 million votes." I think that is amazing, especially since both Davids were equally talented in my opinion. The difference comes down to style. David Archuleta is more of a pop singer while David Cook can do both pop and rock. I also enjoyed the final show last night, especially the part where the Idol singers performed songs from various artists, and then that artist came out to perform with them or solo. It was great!

Wednesday's Reflection: China Earthquake

2008-05-21T06:39:00.004-05:00

Dear Lord,

Please remember all the victims of the recent earthquake which devastated parts of China, especially the mothers who lost their children, and children who lost their mothers. May you come to their aid and give them strength and courage in their darkest hour.

Love,
Ashley

Forever Family Day

2008-05-16T06:41:00.006-05:00

As I celebrate the year anniversary of the day I adopted my second daughter in China, I feel grateful that my wait was only two years, and that God
choose this special child just for me. Little Sister turned "2" in April and enjoyed a birthday party with her family. She especially liked the Cookie Monster cake that
her Mommy made for her. At two, she is sweet, affectionate, intelligent, and curious. Little Sister absolutely adores her big sister and cousins. Her favorite possessions are her blankie, food, toy phones, visiting the park, and her baby dolls.

Once a week, we have a speech therapist come to work with her. At this point, she can only say a few words so the therapy helps. Little Sister is now 26 pounds and 2 ft, 8 inches. She continues to be a deep sleeper, sleeping 11 hours each night and taking a 2 hour nap daily. Her temper flares up occasionally, but she now knows how to self-soothe. She will be baptized this weekend at our church. The past
year has made an incredible difference in her life. I look forward to seeing what changes will happen within the next year.

Portrait of Mei Mei

2008-05-12T20:29:00.001-05:00

Photographed by Big Sister last week.

One of those days. . .

2008-05-09T20:55:00.002-05:00

Today started out being a very good day. I woke up early and drove to the social security office so that I could finally obtain a card for Little Sister. The traffic flow wasn't too heavy and I found the office without any problem. Once inside, I was happily surprised to see that I was only one of two customers. Usually government offices are packed, especially on a Friday. I kept thinking, "Wow, can my morning get any better." After I left the building, I decided to head over to our local library to work on my resume. (I'm still looking for a job!) As I left the library, I started rummaging through my pockets and pocketbook looking for my keys when suddenly I realized that they were not with me. I panicked and walked over to my car. As I peered inside, I could see them laying on the passenger seat right where I left them. Oh crap! Now what I thought! I immediately called my sister. No answer. Then I called her husband who just so happened to be at the same library as me at the exact time. Okay, I thought, maybe we can get out of this jam. My brother-in-law, who is always calm in a time of crisis, gave me his keys so that I could drive his car to my house and look for my spare key. Sounds like a great plan, doesn't it? I drove home, found 'the key' and returned back to the library with rapid speed only to discover that the key didn't fit my car and wasn't the right 'key' after all. Moving past crap at this point to more complex cursing in my head, I returned the key to my brother-in-law and then walked back into the library and asked the librarian for help. She called the non-emergency police line and within minutes, not one, but two elderly gentlemen arrived one after another on their motorized police vehicles to rescue a damsel in distress. Okay, it wasn't really that glamorous. The cops could have been my dad or grandad. I guess the good-looking, younger officers were assisting someone who really needed help. At any rate, I now have my keys and will be more careful about taking them with me in the future.

Wednesday's Reflection

2008-05-07T18:59:00.001-05:00

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

Spring Photos

2008-05-06T08:53:00.002-05:00

When Big Sister turned four, her daddy bought her a digital camera. At first I thought the idea was crazy, but she loves her camera, takes very good care of it and is a good photographer. Check out her latest photos taken at the Chicago Botanical Gardens.

Rummage Sale

2008-05-05T07:47:00.003-05:00

Over the weekend, my daughters and I went to the annual rummage sale in Lake Forest, Illinois. By the time we got there, around 9:30, it was jam-packed with wall to wall people. I'm not even sure how I was able to navigate my two little girls in and around the sale items or people. Believe it or not, we walked away with five bags of clothing and toys. My best finds were the following items: Baby Gap sweaters for Big Sister, an Ann Taylor vest for me and a little school bus for the girls that converts into a classroom. They loved it! Big Sister also loved the sheer "princess" bathrobe that I purchased for a dollar. It was supposed to be for her dress-up box, but she hasn't taken it off since. If you love to shop, but need to stay on a budget, check your local newspaper for upcoming rummage, garage or yard sales. You can walk away with incredible finds.

Spring Concert

2008-04-30T09:28:00.007-05:00

Yesterday, Big Sister's preschool had their annual spring concert. I was lucky enough to have a babysitter which allowed me to capture some video footage and take a few photos. Here they are.

10 Things that make Big Sister happy

2008-04-28T06:40:00.003-05:00

1) Birthday parties

2) Preschool / Sunday school

3) Playing in the sand

4) Creating an art masterpiece

5) Making up stories and songs

6) Ice cream

7) Playdates

8) Playing dress up

9) Being a big sister

10) Mommy

10 Things that make Little Sister happy

2008-04-26T06:12:00.003-05:00

1) Her blankie which she affectionately refers to as "B."

2) A gray and white stuffed kitty she got from Uncle Mike.

3) Food, especially bananas and yogurt, her favorite snack.

4) Going to the park.

5) Any kind of phone. She is fascinated with them!

6) Elmo

7) Cookie Monster

8) Cookies

9) Her Baby Songs video

10) Mama

Mei Mei Video Recommendation

2008-04-24T06:53:00.005-05:00

Each year on the anniversary of our forever family day, I try to buy my daughters' something that represents their Chinese heritage. This past February, I bought Big Sister the Dance and Learn Chinese with Mei Mei DVD. Little did I know what a huge hit it would be. Both of my girls absolutely love it! They put on their ballet outfits and dance around, fluttering like delicate butterflies. More beautiful than a field of spring flowers. You can purchase the video or DVD from Amazon.com. Mei Mei is actually a grown woman who guides a group of students. Together, they teach children how to speak and sing Chinese. We really love this DVD and highly recommend it to anyone with children adopted from China.

Busy mom makes time to exercise

2008-04-19T06:40:00.002-05:00

Before the arrival of my youngest daughter, I pretty much had it made. Big Sister started preschool last year, attending three mornings each week, which gave me free time to do whatever I wanted. To fill my time, I joined a Jazzercise class. For those who haven't done Jazzercise before, it's basically a combination of aerobics, dance, and Pilates. The classes are taught by highly qualified instructors who promise to give you a great workout. When I moved to Illinois, I was bummed to find out that there is no Jazzercise in my area. Instead, I have recently joined a Hatha yoga class where I am learning new postures, stretches, and breathing techniques. Yoga is a vast difference from Jazzercise, not easier, just different.

The Girl Next Door Wins Bret's Heart

2008-04-17T06:29:00.009-05:00

The writer's strike may have stopped us from watching new episodes of our favorite TV shows, but it did wonders for reality TV. I should know because that's all I watched at night during the past few months. One of the shows that got me hooked was Bret Michael's, Rock of Love 2. I never did see Rock of Love 1, but apparently last season, he chose the wrong girl and the relationship didn't pan out. Bret is the lead singer for Poison, an American rock band that first formed in 1983. This summer, Bret Michaels will be releasing Rock My World, his newest solo CD. In Rock of Love 2, women from various walks of life competed to win Bret's heart. In the end, it came down to Daisy, a seemingly neurotic stripper still living with her ex-boyfriend and the accomplished, yet wild girl next door, Ambre. He choose Ambre who in my opinion was definitely the best bet.

Seven Things You Need to Adopt a Child

2008-04-16T06:30:00.002-05:00

I found this article by Deborah Mumm and thought it was very accurate. Adoption is an emotional journey of filling out paperwork, homestudies, waiting, prayer and patience, but in the end, it is worth every crazy moment. Here is Mumm's article:

7 Reasons to Adopt a Child
by: Deborah Mumm

Seven Things You Need to Adopt a Child

(1) The desire to have a child – whether it is your first child or your sixth. Having a child is the most difficult job you will ever have but is also the most rewarding. This child will probably not appreciate all that you went through to adopt him/her until adulthood, but realize that biological children won’t either!

(2) Which country do you wish to adopt from? Countries (even the USA) vary in their wait times, costs, availability of certain sex & age of child, etc. Do your research and then go where your heart leads you.

(3) Talk to adoptive parents. Find local support groups or message boards on the internet. (Example: Russianadoption@yahoo.com) Ask questions. Adoptive parents love to talk about their adoption journey.

(4) Read current books and articles. But, beware! Newspapers love articles that grab the reader’s attention! This usually means a negative story on adoption gone wrong! Please realize that for every bad story there are hundreds of happy stories….but happy stories don’t sell papers.

(5) The money…sigh! Know that you will need at least $15,000 for one adoption. You will be eligible for a $10,000 tax credit, but not until after the adoption is complete. If you don’t have much money saved up, don’t give up hope. Studies show that most adoptive parents are not in the wealthy bracket. Most are average income earners and many are just big-hearted families with lots of love but not much money. Again…the internet is loaded with grant programs and loan ideas of adoption. If you are motivated, you will find a way. If you needed a new car or appliance you’d find a way to finance one. The life of a child is much more fulfilling in the grand scheme of things.

(6) The paperwork…ugh! There will be stacks of papers needing to be signed and notarized. (Find a notary early on that you like to work with!) Some papers will seem ridiculous to you and many people will question your sanity as you blindly fill them out over and over! You will learn quickly that you will do what is asked for to help your child. It is all worth it in the end. Think of the paperwork as labor pains…it will end and there will be a child at the end of it all!

(7) Faith! The most important thing you’ll need is faith…and lots of it. Faith you’ll find the money. Faith that the right child is matched to you. Faith in a foreign country where you are the foreigner and that you must do whatever is asked of you. Many times it will be blind faith leading you to your child. But when they give that child to you and you kiss his little face, you will see the power of adoption and the choices you made creating a future for this little person, who until you came, had none. And months later when he is calling Mama and Papa and rolling in laughter on your living room floor you will know you were given the best gift in the world. A child that loves you!

Happy Birthday Mei-Mei

2008-04-12T07:09:00.012-05:00

This past Saturday (April 12th), we celebrated my daughter's second birthday. She has been home now for almost 11 months and has come a long, long way. When we adopted her last May, she came to us like a wounded bird, fearful, distrusting and angry. I didn't know what to make of her. Her issues seemed overwhelming to me, the intense jealousy she felt toward any affection I gave her sister, her desire to control my every move, and the deep sadness that permeated her dark eyes. I searched high and low for answers and prayed daily, asking God to help us both. He did! The first gift he gave me was the realization that in order for me to help Little Sister with her problems, I had to first accept her, tantrums and all. I had to love her enough to help her heal. To move past her birthmother abandoning her at two months of age, and from the neglect and abuse she suffered in the orphanage during her eleven month stay there. After I accepted her, I fell in love with her, but let her know upfront that Mommy was in charge. Her tantrums and screaming were not permitted. She had to learn to trust in me as well as the other adults in her life, a new concept for her, but one that is beginning to form. With a lot of patience, prayer, Early Intervention, holding therapy and her beloved blankie, she has become happier, more confident and sweet. I look forward to seeing her continue to flourish over the years and hope that her early life's pain can somehow be erased or softened from her memory. Here are some photos from her bithday and one from Gotcha Day.

Little Sister on her adoption day. She was the saddest little girl that I have ever seen.

All smiles!

The Birthday Girl!

Having fun with her sister and cousins.

My niece's 2nd birthday!

2008-04-06T19:38:00.002-05:00

My sister's little girl, Cutie Pie, turns 2 years-old today. She is exactly six days older than my youngest daughter. The girls are good friends and thoroughly enjoy each other's company. Yesterday, her mom and dad gave Cutie Pie a wonderful, Elmo themed birthday party, complete with balloons, party hats and an amazing Elmo cupcake cake. Here are a few photos from the party.

Lifetime Movie Alert

2008-04-03T20:04:00.003-05:00

For those of you who loved the bestselling novel, The Memory Keeper's Daughter, get ready, because on April 12 at 9 p.m., the movie will air on Lifetime. I loved the book and am looking forward to seeing the movie which will hopefully be as good.

Wednesday's Reflection - Cherry Blossoms

2008-04-02T07:02:00.003-05:00

I am in love with cherry blossoms, hence today's post. I have always loved them! Perhaps it is because they are so beautiful and fragrant, yet fragile and fleeting just like spring itself. They remind us of God's creation and the gift of nature. It is free for us to enjoy. All we have to do is take the time to explore it.

"In the cherry blossom's shade,
there is no such thing
as a stranger." - Unknown

Playing at Kohl's Museum

2008-03-30T07:48:00.000-05:00

Family Fun

2008-03-28T08:54:00.001-05:00

$15 worth of happiness

2008-03-27T07:05:00.002-05:00

A few weeks ago, my sister shared one of her best kept secrets, a fabulous nail salon located near her house that gives $15 manicures. Yesterday, I went for my second one. Having been a stay-at-home mom for three years was wonderful for my children, but horrible on my nails which have become incredibly brittle. Ridges belong in the ocean, not on my fingernails! They look just awful! My dermatologist recommended that I take Appearex, a biotin supplement, and start getting regular manicures to strengthen the nails. It's only been a few weeks, but my nails are starting to strengthen. Through my chipped nail saga, I was happy to find my little inexpensive nail salon where I can relax without the kids for a few minutes whenever I need a break.

Happy Easter

2008-03-23T06:49:00.000-05:00

A tender moment. . .

2008-03-21T06:57:00.002-05:00

One night last week, my youngest daughter, woke up crying in her sleep. I didn't hear her which is unusual because motherhood has given me a very keen sense of hearing. For whatever reason, I didn't hear her cry, but her big sister, who shares a room with her did. I know this because the next morning, she conveyed the whole story to me quite eloquently.

"Mei-Mei woke up crying last night. It woke me up. I went over to her crib and patted her head. She stopped crying and looked at me. Then, she stood up and patted my arm. After a few minutes, I told her that I was very tired and needed to go back to bed. She laid down and we both went to sleep."

Wednesday's Reflection: Adoptive Parents

2008-03-19T06:44:00.003-05:00

I found this list on one of my message boards this morning and thought it was too good to pass up.

You Know You're An Adoptive Parent When . . .

1. The fact that there are 143 million children without a parent to kiss them goodnight has made you lose sleep.
2. You realize DNA has nothing to do with love and family.
3. You can't watch Adoption Stories on TLC without sobbing.
4. The fact that, if 7% of Christians adopted 1 child there would be no orphans in the world, is convicting to you.
5. You spend free time surfing blogs about families who have experienced the blessing of adoption.
6. It drives you crazy when people ask you about adopted child's 'real' parents.
7. You were 'pregnant' with your adoptive child longer than it takes an elephant to give birth. (2 years!)
8. You had no idea how you would afford to adopt but stepped out in faith anyway, knowing where God calls you, he will provide.
9. You are willing to take an airplane ride half-way around the world with a child you just met.
10. You believe God's heart is for adoption.
11. You realize that welcoming a child into your heart and family is one of the most important legacies you could ever leave on this earth.
12. You know what the word 'Dossier' means, and you can actually pronounce it!
13. You have welcomed a social worker into the most private parts of your life.
14. You shudder when people say your child is so lucky that you adopted them, knowing full well you are the blessed one to have him or her in your life.

-Author unknown